Drink Up, Bitches

When I first started salsa dancing six years ago, I gave myself a rule: no drinking and dancing. Spinning while tipsy scared the shit out of me. Visions of crashing into the couples around me prevented me from taking more than two sips of booze.

But as time went on, I tested those boundaries — not because my technique improved and I thought I could handle it, but because I really wanted to have some drinks with friends!

So, you find yourself beyond tipsy. You're sloppy and perhaps half a cocktail away from being Lindsay Lohan. No amount of training and technique can compensate for the amount of liquor you drank, but you still want to dance!

1) Plan ahead. Wardrobe malfunctions are 52% more likely to occur when you are drunk, and it's always wise to keep Victoria's Secret if you know what I mean. Best to wear something you've danced in before and you know won't slip off. (Ok fine, I made up that statistic, but trust me, flashing your partner and not even realizing it until the song is over can be embarrassing once you sober up...but on the upside, at least you'll be memorable).

2) Avoid fast songs where possible. Your compromised hand-eye coordination will surely result in an elbow in his eye. Plus, move around too fast and you risk puking all over your new salsa shoes.  Not pretty. Stick to slow tracks.

3) It's the perfect opportunity to get your bachata on. Bachata always feels good...mmm, bachata...

4) If you’re at a club and they play merengue, let go of any thoughts that it's not a challenging enough dance and just have some fun! You're in no condition to handle challenging moves anyway, so don't hate on merengue. Same goes with reggaeton.

5) If all else fails, wiggle your hips while you have another drink. Hey, that's technically still dancing!